We all need desperate help. Maybe we should just become a group of people who walk around town and shit in peoples air vents
I'm down.
I don't know where I am but there are firefighters
why is allison so mad at me??
me and her walked into dans and you yelled "hello my dear alli, you're looking mighty overweight today!".
crap..
2000 dollars has been put in for bail money. Also we're signing contracts
I have to stop envisioning penises as dragons.
Note to self: semen does not count as food to take medicine with
I just made the answer to all my security questions "fuck you" with various levels of ! marks. I may regret this in the morning.
Just ate a chocolate chip cookie upside down. This is what having a degree does for you.
I want to sit on top of her nipple mountains and reenact the Ricola commercial.
There's no button for "gave my boyfriend's cock to a friend" on my intimacy calendar.
Like if Ohio doesn't think I can get smashed on wine I will gladly prove them wrong
he answered his phone during sex and left to go help that drama queen with her latest bullshit. I'm drinking all his vodka. it's asshole tax
But if you move out who will get drunk with me on the roof and yell at boys?!?
You punched me in the face while blackout. 20 min later I told you I'd been punched in the face and you yelled 'by who, imma go kill 'em!'
VIVE LA RESISTANCE
Oh god, what now?
Randomize
