at some point when you're making out with the ex girlfriend of your ex fuck buddy who happens to be the ex boyfriend of the girl that you just got drunk with who was hitting on your current fuck buddy who is best friends with your ex boyfriend, it just hits you: oh my god i need to get out more and expand my social circle.
Is Jonathan Taylor Thomas a gay? I need you to google search it for me. Its important
Woke up to a denim duvet cover this morning... why r guys so tacky?
we got our roommate high for the first time. He went into his room alone and watched Malcolm in the middle for three hours
jersey shore has given me a vivid depiction of what things will be like for me once i get to hell
we saw a llama on the side of the road. That's when we knew everything was going to be alright.
i dont know if you remember blowing your vomity nose directly into my hand...yeah thanks for that
What can I say? I like my food like I like my women, not entirely fucked by our contemporary world.
I convinced a German girl that I was born while my mom was water skiing and I preceded to barefoot ski behind her via the umbilical cord...
We could put on there: "Drink jager bombs and do stupid shit faster, with more energy!"
roommates are droppin acid, i really should stop them from staring directly at the light bulb, but their giggles are so enchanting.
My mother just set me up with the son of the man I fucked last weekend. I could crawl under a rock and die OR I could remember the rules of genetics and hope that JR takes after daddy. Wish me luck...
it looks like a nuclear can of fuck blew up in here
Is it bad form to puke out of a dorm window to avoid looking bad in front of the people in your room?
How about from a sixth floor window?
He's a college graduate, has an excellent job, and respects his family. To say nothing of his 8.5 inch cock. His narcolepsy not withstanding...I'm marrying this motherfucker.
Randomize