im not an educated person. i just do things. and it works out in my favor
Next thing I know we're all standing in the kitchen holding hands and thanking God for the beer.
As much as I'm all for laying on his living room couch, watching spongebob and having spoon sex, it's becoming a routine.
and a jello shot exploded in my bra last night. Now I have blueberry smurfette boobs. Awesome.
NEW INFORMATION meech found me passed out on a bench outside.
when the officer asked him if he had been drinking, he just goes, "yeah, you?" then falls onto the table.
I'm in a waiting room at the hospital - and there's a dude here who is WAY too proud of his urine sample.
Bianca brought a stripper home he's making me breakfast
We've been staking out a taco bell for 2 hours trying to find last night's one night stand
He makes balloon animals that get you high? Hell yeah invite him over!
So the tow truck driver didn't charge us because Ian convinced him that he was sent out by God to share his cocaine with us.
Currently tripping balls and watching Pink Floyd the wall and I'm crying during it. If this isn't a self realization then I don't know what to tell you.
Im going to the gym...covered in the Brazilians cum
And how is that different than any other weeknight in your world
The shitshow that was last night is the gift that just keeps on giving
when part of the plan includes getting high, i usually forget how the rest of the plan goes.
Randomize
