Me too!
i didnt like the question options for my yahoo account..so i made up the question and it was "favorite bathroom to shit in"
i just ate a whole pizza and threw it back up in the time span of 13 minutes. give me the number to guiness book of world records.
Definitely just blazed with the housekeeper. That woman needs a raise
no normal human would even think about making waldo slutty but you
Brought 2 entire pizzas with to the bar, everyone loves us
Just successfully went through airport security with shrooms. It's gonna be a fucking awesome new years
I've seen people win free drinks for a lot less dude, no need to drop trou on a piano.
Definitely broke my toe and messed up my knee walking back. Drink hitch hiking should never happen again.
Dude. She came to my room in nothing but a trench coat. Took it off and said, "you like" in her Costa Rican accent. God I love college.
So I've been spending my morning trying to figure out if there's a corealation between Wednesday margarita night and the boat that's now in my living room.
Do you remember telling our cab driver you were going to fuck a penguin?
I was drunk and gave him my dad's phone number instead because somehow I thought that'd be funny. Man did that fucking backfire
Yeah I know my dick is weird, but I've surprisingly had a lot of fun with it.
It's dangerous to be this horny at work. I'm gonna stain my desk chair
Randomize
