STUCK IN CAPS. WANA GET AFTER IT TOMORROW?
this kid just came up to me and asked me if i wanted to play truth or aids with him and his friends. i'm in
turns out making maccaroni and cheese with whipped cream instead of butter is only good when your high
i used the phrase horny rhinos in my paper. i hope my teacher appreciates the size of my balls
i want to major in coloring with an emphasis on crayons.
so finals studying is going well?
I'm pretty sure I saw a man standing on a table with no shirt on getting sugar thrown at him while "pour some sugar on me" blaring while the cops were in the house.
Watching the 1st game of the world cup. I'll drunk dial you at 8:30 to wake you up for work.
i think i left my bra at your place
It's still hanging from my ceiling fan. Please let me keep it there.
he somehow instantly knew i was from vermont.
it probably had something to do with chasing your soco with maply syrup.
Grandma can hear your bong from the living room, please be more quiet. Love mom.
We were tripping too hard to figure out to tell him where we were so we sent a picture of me laying outside the tent saying "find us"
Don't feel sorry for me. I'm getting Red Lobster and sex tonight. Nothing can bring me too far down.
I fully committed to my astronaut costume, to say the least. blacking out on moonshine and having a moonwalk of shame this morning: happy Halloweekend.
You would seriously think I would remember who put themselves in my phone as Burt Rynalds Moustache, but I don't. And I need to be reminded of who you are so I can give you a proper high five.
How do I say “I have great tits” without it sounding awful
Randomize
