honestly, who buys weed with an unemployment check?
you.
oh yeah. preciate
In a few years, 50 babies 50 states. Like it?
Your mom is more observant then Randy Newman.
hey, its the girl who gave you a bloody nose and paid you back with a blow job. have you seen my shoes?
what is the protocol for being hungover enough to vomit in a potted plant during my botany lecture?
She took a crow from her moms Halloween decorations, taped it to her shoulder, went to the bar and made the guys buy a drinks for both her and the crow.
The video of him doing the dougie made me telling him I didn't want a relationship, just his virginity so much easier.
My masturbation fantasy just had a wedding theme. I need new hobbies.
I'm just gonna use that pot butter as dip for chips. That's fat, American AND stoner!
you wouldn't let anybody come in after ten. everybody was standing outside and you just yelled "BEING PUNCTUAL IS IMPORTANT" and slammed the door. i dont think you should be allowed to have parties anymore
it concerns me that i was already that drunk at 10
its not even a love triangle. its a love square and it has come back to haunt me
She is still out of it but keeps saying ur name she said to tell u dinosaurs aren't real but biscuit with a z made bad choices
Ah Christ I think I've reached the single life mentality 100%. I just inquired a photographer about a photo shoot with my dog.
I'm at forever 21 and someone pooped in the dressing room.
Spencer just told me I got home and was opening beers with my teeth and trying to make pot butter
Randomize
