You and your empty threats of no sex. Like.u.cud.hold.out.
yea i came on her face and told her to bring a snorkel next time
i just googled "who won the civil war" . how can i still have a 97% in this class?
Look on the bright side, you can mark 'beastiality' off your bucket list
we knew you were done when they played It's All Coming Back To Me Now by Celine Dion and you started crying
He rode my dog to the bathroom and wouldn't stop laughing once he got in. It was scary.
Dude she's on meds. He has a ginormous penis. Ur A dumbass. That concludes our feelings chat. Dim Sumday?
We should hook up after this. Laugh or look horrified to say yes.
my memory may be fuzzy, but the 20+ naked pictures I sent him were surprising clear
Dude he did say "let's go cougar hunting" and you KNEW your mom was going out last night...so it's kind of your own fault for not coming
I think it's gonna be hard to find a guy that won't take my consistent drinking as alcoholism
Locals got pissed I was talking to the barmaid. Tried to tell me that they keep all the good beer at "a Soho walkup" Google saved me
Watching my ex make out with another girl is weird.
But she's wearing a jumpsuit so I feel better.
I'm ordering sushi and crying over finals. Come over and bring wine.
You know how last week before we left I was drinking outta that blue cup and I left it sitting across the road. Well, it hadn't moved and my family just found it, brought it inside and cleaned it. I think this cup is my soulmate.
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