So I just had this crazy idea, and no it has nothing to do with the fact that they made me take shots at work.
tonight is proof that a xbox 360 will always be more reliable than a girl ever will
and a girl gets the red ring of death every month
Phosphoglyceraldehydration... why the fuck is this a word
You kept calling me your small dog last night.
So I went outside my house this morning and basically my entire front lawn is covered in gummi bears... I think that involves you guys.
yeah after seeing those pics of her puking into my underwear drawer i remembered again why i didn't want to invite her.
you didn't check your sock drawer yet did you
Just got walked in on during safety inspections
Think you passed?
You just handed me your ATM card and wrote your PIN number on a dollar bill and said "for bail money."
I just slow jerked to the titanic theme song, i dont think theres enough alcohol in the state to get me over her tonight
I wish they made people sized litter boxes.
What do you mean you don't want me to steal the manikin do you have any idea how expensive inflatable dolls are I can't get that for your birthday
In case you're wondering where my head is at right now, it's wishing that I was getting laid and not having a debate about cheese.
We walked in and someone handed her an unopened bottle of jack with her name on it. She's like a drunken celebrity.
Is "head down ass up" an appropriate way to say good morning?
just walked passed a black light...apparently he DID cum.
Randomize
