so I'm never txting u again after today...
y?
cuz i don't wanna see it on blogspot :)
ha...too late
can I come stay the night
yeah, but no sex tonight
I'll stay home
i cant do it anymore.. every time this girl orgasms she sounds like a motorcycle
The only thing i was looking forward to on 4th of july was the google logo and they let me down. That and beer, lots and lots of beer
What's the big deal? you guys fuck
3 times is my limit. I don't even want to know you exist after 3 times
Dude. The girls called me over to see what they had in their dorm. They snuck in a pigeon in a cardboard box. They named it Quincey. They swear they're sober.
His search history includes homemade sex toys and a plunger. I'm scared about what goes on in their place.
Trustme, don't ever look up when you're giving road head. It's awkward.
I'd probably lick every tooth in Carly Rae Jepson's fucking mouth.
Teen Choice Awards are on if your wondering.
Note to self; if you can light it on fire, you probs shouldn't drink it
Enroute to my place eta 6 mikes...estimated time until intoxicated? 45 mikes. Commence the timer.
Didn't have the heart to tell him that while he was eating my ass I was laughing, not moaning, into the pillow
He caught a Pokemon on my head while I sucked him off. I think I need to marry him.
I need an honest answer, no judgements. Would it make me a bad person if I fucked the other twin?
Guess how much it costs to flush your pants down the toilet?
Randomize
