youre lurking in front of me
I just accidently tagged myself in the picture of the 16 year olds spreading their legs in bikinis. Failure.
he said no sex till date three. i said the party was one, mcdonalds two and that i would take him with me to buy cigs for date three.
What I wanna know is who took a picture eiffel towering her?
i just spent 10 minutes talking to the lady who works at taco bell about my romantic situation.
Im not spending 10 to get hit on by potential transexuals even if they are cuter than most of the girls I dated.
She was pretty drunk. It was like watching a puppy explore the world for the first time.
attractive or not, he has more than one book on serial killers. i'm gonna get out of here while i can
I'm in Starbucks carrying the boxes wine and the hubcap. So many judging looks.
Putting a breathalyzer in a bar is a horrible idea. But I won
I'm approaching homosexuality at an increasingly alarming rate with each break up.
I'm throwing in the towel on today. The puke gods have won this war
So worth it. Come over for bacon egg cheese vusquit later. 12. I slept with Jimmy? On my period? And told him he had mother issues? No tequila. Tequila bad.
I just saw a woman give her infant whiskey tits. About ten minutes ago she was doing shots, and now she's breast feeding. Whiskey. Tits.
Im 76 percent sure I took a fully clothed shower last night.
Randomize
