Princeton has an emergency contraception worldwide website. It is in moments like these that I love my university
woke up in my one night stand's bed and barfed all over her floor. she came back from the bathroom, looked at the vomit, looked at me and said "normally i'd tell you to clean it and get the fuck out, but i remember the sex was good, so i'll let it go." Score.
Wish you were here....
And I wish your mouth was around my cock, but that never happens, does it?
you started texting yourself and saying they were "divine messages from heaven" then you threw up on stacie's piano.
I think i found piece of your tooth in my dick this morning when i took a shower
Worst PDA I've ever seen. She even licked the mustard off his mustach
July 5th AKA Day of regret AKA picnicing in a laundromat. Someone puked allover the comforter. Liffe of champions.
Yeah he's definitely gonna feel that one when he wakes up. I beat the shit out of him with that broom handle.
they were having sex on the toilet apparently and everytime someone knocked they flushed. it was like an auditory scoreboard of sex duration.
it doesn't matter, he's just a life support system for his dick
How can someone be so bad at fingering? It's such a simple concept
He made me choke him and call him Papi..so all in all a good night.
She was a little thick, but we banged on the beach and fireworks went off as we finished so I think God wanted it
Hmmm, well all I'm saying is don't do anything too irrational because you miss him and are blinded by his large penis.
But yeah, I am thinking that "Cake Heresy" will now be a thing
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