I can only speak casual parseltoungue, im not bad though. just the general, "wheres the bathroom?" "open the chamber of secrets" that type of stuff
everyone is single if you try hard enough
Did you dl zombie porn on my computer?
well,he told me "i bet you five bucks that i can right cum on the mirror with my cum" i said alright do it, lets just say he's five bucks richer...
Wow anytime a scalper has i need tix written on the back of a franzia box thats a trusted seller
You weren't lying about those ceramics students giving the best hand jobs.
had to go back to that apartment this morning to get my other boot. it was tacked to the wall
I fell asleep to him stroking my ass calling it his precious.
So I'm about to drive his drunk ass home and he spits on my car. Before I can say, "Dude, what the fuck?!", he puts his finger to my lips and goes "shhh, its in the past."
I made out with about ten people last night. And four of them were just on the way to my car from the bar. And one was my roommate.
My nose was gushing blood and he just kept screaming "she took it like a champ" to everyone there. Plus side though, bartender felt bad for me and gave me a free drink.
I WOULD NEVER MIX DICK AND MCDONALDS
Sundays were made for eating Ramen pantless in bed.
I want your attention. I want your attention in the form of your penis inside my vagina.
I consider walking to the bars and dancing my exercise and I buy doubles so my drinks r heavier so that's my arm workout
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