brad dismisses pussy with prejudice
I'm sitting here watching a kid lick a basketball- where have i gone wrong in life?
If someone cleans their bathroom and shaves their crotch for you you kinda have to admit the relationship to facebook
This show inspires me to have sex in space
as soon as I walked into work this morning, my boss called me out on my hangover, patted me on the back and said I'm getting time an a half for even showing up. Did I really look that bad this morning?
Just picture a dyson vacuum with razor blades. That's how it felt.
He's moaning and crying and coughing up something audibly liquid. I can't live in this house any more.
This american gymnastics guy.... He just messed up. I feel so bad. I just wanna hug him until he stops crying. Not even in a sexual way. I just wanna hug him.
Is she still in your room?
Not for long. My plan is to smoke her out like a small woodland creature.
I thought I could grab a hold of my stream of urine. So she left pretty soon after that.
They should incorporate dolphins into professional surfing
I wish I had a clear image of the dude who was sucking on my tit outside the bar last night
I kinda wanna drive through the Gator bar parking lot and seeing if my panties are on they ground, they should be right next to my pride...
Your life is a soap opera of great sex, cats, and booze.
I was so high I forgot how to swallow food, and I just kept thinking "thank god its just mashed potatoes, they'll go down eventually"
Randomize