My astrological sign? Vagitarius.
I would make tea from her tampons just to see her tits
just woke up in a hotel room.. realizing its the hotel i work at.. lets see how this walk of shame turns out
Beach body diet is off. Pizza hut worked its way back onto my google chrome top 8
Does Vicodin go better with white or red wine?
it was like watching bambi learning to walk, if bambi was 22 and a high functioning alcoholic.
Was I really yelling "girls night" at random chicks before stealing and drinking all their shots?
I have a huge bruise on my thigh that I am 95% sure is due to you repeatedly throwing me over couches.
Haha. I got you. I always pay you back somehow. Do you accept all major forms of payment: cash, taco bell, and patriotic underwear?
Omg. The news was on TV while I was giving him a bj...when the weatherman said its a beautiful start to December, he groaned and said it sure is.
Are there any plans to where i might need to be dressed semi-nicely or is it a "pants optional" weekend?
CSI Miami is on and the guy is trying to save this woman who got shot. By stripping off his shirt & belt. THE WOMAN NEEDS YOUR PANTS OFF TOO
Strip Simon Says: DO IT
2 weeks into this dating someone with money thing and I already don't know if I can go back to the being poor life
He spent three years trying to get a chance with me and finally broke me down. then he came in two minutes and was so upset he locked himself in the bathroom so I helped myself to his weed and left. Wanna get stoned?
Randomize
