Honey, If i waited till marriage I wouldnt know what a dick tasted like.
The guy in front of me in Sociology is definitely working on my farm in farmville. Never met him before. Do I thank him?
I'm to the point in my high that every song eventually turns into Lady Gaga
my Prof for my bio lab has his lab coat collar popped. it's 8 am and im too hungover for this guy
the teacher just ate a hash brownie and passed out on the bus best field trip 2010'
So i guess i slapped the girl sitting next to me leg and said "You know what they say, got fat legs...you gotta fat BOX"
Sign #1 that I'm not ready to be a mother: I'm shopping for "maternity fishnets".
Are you complaining because you're getting too much sex to find the time to masturbate?
Well, when you say it like that it sounds silly.
We just took back to back grav bong hits and are playing battleship. She guessed Z - 12 so weve switched board games.
An image of us stuck like that like Pompeii comes to mind. A wonder for future anthropologists
The last thing I remember about last night was guzzling white zinfandel out of the box and eating cheese. And I was thinking OH YOU FANCY HUHHH
I found it. now I'm going to the gym to be "healthy" or whatever that folklore is called.
Did you ever think you lost your bong and then you find it in the weirdest place? I mean, who leaves their bong in the shower?
I deleted all traces of him from my phone
even the dick picks he sent you?
no are you nuts? saved that shit to my camera roll
Compositionally, that's actually a really nice picture.
And your penis looks really nice too.
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