so evidently yelling "gay" everytime your bf tells you how he feels is cause for breakup. news to me
JoAnns office is warmer than mine. . .it must be because she has the gateway to hell under her desk.
I was debating whether her purse was real then I saw her puke in it.
we turned studying into a drinking game, she drinks when she gets it right, i drink when she gets it wrong. so we'll be out soon
and yes, the jail cell in Citi Field does have a big Mets symbol in it
We found her in the fireplace eating dog biscuits.
My mom and dad are smoking a joint while lecturing me on what to bring and how to act in Europe. I'll finish this glass of wine and head over.
hes out at the street wearing a tophat and a monocole and carrying a cane and greeting every car that drives by
he just went across the street and into someones house and we could hear him inviting them over from the front porch
you were stumbling down richmond carrying a girl in a nurse costume. its not even halloween dude
I woke up naked to an alarm set for 11:18 pm and missing a shoe. How was your night?
Omg my butt feels so much better. Those suppositories are magic. It feels like Jesus fingered me in my sleep.
Nothing like sitting at your midterm pissed at yourself because you put your graphing calculator batteries in your vibrator and forgot to put them back in before the exam 😑
my Mom is now my Eskimo sister... she fucked my ex in my bed and took a selfie
Just a typical Friday. Dinner, drinks, doing lines with a member of Congress
Bro I rebuilt the dungeon in animal crossing visit me
Broooo
Randomize
