I thought she would fill the void you created. Turns out she thought I just wanted to fill hers.
Journey is playing on the radio....I think it is a sign I am going to pass my drug test
apparently you can't crawl through the drive-thru window
Walked into a liquor store bleeding. That kind of night.
He just said he was the Jesus of alcoholics.
I'm not sure which one did it but one of them fucked the kink out of my neck
When a man can't even pay attention to you when you're telling him about how big his penis is, there's something wrong
Ideas I've had tonight: An entire movie based off the Pixar lamp jumping on stuff.
And after peeing my pants waiting outside for him, i proceeded to drop down and roll in the nearest puddle to pretend like i just ate shit when he arrived
This taxi driver is not happy I am in drag
I may or may not have pissed on my floor last night
Welcome to 22
COME HERE AND I WILL SUCK YOUR COCK UNDER THE LIGHT OF THIS BEAUTIFUL ELECTRICITY
I even put my vibrators back in the bedroom instead of the coffee table. If that's not growing up then I don't know what is.
Also, do you have any insight as to WHY I have a note saved from the 17th of June that reads *clears throat*, "you got that swanky blues libido"
No I'm not lying to you. I'm just not telling you the whole story. There's a massive difference.
Randomize
