I woke up fully clothed on top of my sheets and i didnt even pee myself..so proud.
so my mom told me to suck on something if I have to cough. so I guess blow jobs are ok
adderall just fell out of my nose in class. guy next to me just nodded.
She was wasted. Kept yelling "what if I'm pregnant" and trying to push me into the tree. First and last time I bring a girl to my family christmas party.
Me + Nice restaurant + Copious amounts of booze + obscene comments to couples = valentine's day plans
just passed out again, this time at a subway. On a positive not they gave me a free sandwich, pretty sure out pity but at this point i don't care
Last time I saw him the sun was coming up and he was asleep in the student wellness parking lot. For some reason people were peeing on him.
I don't understand but I fell asleep naked holding a tub of cool whip and a boiled egg
I slept with him that night and I'm not sure if my lack of enthusiasm was obvious but I found him eating ice cream in the bathtub the next morning. Mom will be so proud.
Lmao I should put that ad on Craigslist "in need of muscular and determined team of men to carry drunken birthday whore safely home"
These kids are nice. Shrooms make everything so nice.
And speaking of good acting I may have a sex tape now
Be there in 20. Want icecream?
sex. I want sex. I like where your heads at though.
He's a douche. But I like the way he chokes me.
How much beer/TP for a BJ? Trying to set my new rates.
Randomize
