these burps are starting to have way more vomit in them,
i told him i was gay. he said that gay guys are supposed to be pretty.
planned parenthood is perfect for picking up chicks...they all put out
We're so high we're finding things in the room to build a submarine with. So far we have two cardboard boxes, a piece of wood, puffy paint, and an empty bottle to use as a periscope.
I can't ever handle being "that girl" again. At least not until next semester.
you kept typing in answers.com, why are the state police calling my house, expecting an answer
This is working out surprisingly well considering it started out with us using a christmas tree as a battering ram
my mom just asked if she should wash your furry handcuffs with the lights or darks
Someone took a picture of their balls on my phone last night. BEAUTIFUL PACKAGE. I will find this man.
Now that we both have boys can we make up games that objectify them as sex toys?
There's gotta be a lawn gnome full ecstasy around here somewhere. And by golly I will find it
Would I be crazy if I drove 1,000 miles for some dick? What mile does it become ridiculous?
THE FASTEST WAY TO MY HEART IS THROUGH FAMILY SIZED BAGS OF GENERIC BRAND CHEESE BALLS
I think one make out session at a bar per year is probably the best choice.
I fucked her with a giant balloon tied to my dick. You tell ME how my night went
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