I don't know how I got that girl last night. I feel like seal right now sans the scars
I just found 22 drunken videos and 4 naked pictures on my phone. We'll start the bidding at $5
so thats when we found her crawling hands and knees up first street singing hold me closer tony danza as loud as she could
did she say where she was going
apparently she thought she was on morton hill and was trying to go back to the bars
where does the pee come out of this thing
Can you get arrested or in trouble for punching a dead relative in a casket?
Also, I had a dream I had a ray gun and woke up holding my dick.
It's taken me 5 years and 2 beers to finally realize that maybe he isn't the dude for me. Also, that picking your major should be done sober, lest you find your self an art major.
I just haven't been myself lately. I slept with a guy 21 years older than me and I've been wearing my hair in a center part.
Jenna, I'm going to use all my homosexual powers to steal him from you
Austin, I will climb on top of your shoulders and slowly suffocate you with my vagina
I might stash a bottle of vodka in your mailbox, that way if I wanna leave early I can drink in your frontyard till you get back.
Only ESPN could find the two ugly girls from a school in Florida
I vaguely remember losing my underwear to 2 chicks in a bathroom. That drunk.
Guy fieri is speaking only to me. We make eye contact. My whole body is vibrating. My head is purring. I am literally marbles.
TJ is going to paint me in a Patriots Jersey he can paint you in an eagle jersey. Did this last year and got so much dick.
Interlocking vagina powers go!!'
Oh god, your drunk again aren't you?
Randomize
