sorry if i was weird last night, had weird deja vu that we had done that before, i mean with the peanut butter.
we had.
well that explains the rash. i dont think i should see you again.
He came through my line today and bought designer impostor perfume, just for men gel, and astroglide. I almost DIED.
And i quote: "where's y'alls from comin' in with them accents?" - from a mississipi mcdonalds
Fair warning.. porn on your laptop when you turn it on.. seemed like a wonderful idea last night.. until it died
My body is being held together with whiskey, nicotine, duct tape and a little bit of hope...
I'm. Arresyed bur sierra ue obbe of mt vet friends. I hope we can tyajk ane gwt ob the same page. Ur aweaome ttyl.
Her idea of kinky involved a tazer
wtf?
I'm going back tonight
He bought my favorite ceral.. I've guess I've earn the status as one of his regular fuck buddies. I feel honored and proud. His roommates girls don't get this treatment.
I just commented on the education level of his penis.
end of the world party next friday. virgin sacrifice. tell me you know someone whos still a virgin
Not yoga, whiskey. Totally mis-typed whiskey.
I've woke up with the same hoodie on backwards, twice this week. I think that's a record
I walked into my room last night at 4 am and there's a random dude in his boxers eating oatmeal on my futon. I looked at him and went to bed
ill let you put your finger in a lot of things. but a ring is not one of them.
Hey do u remember the time we used my mascara wand as a drink stirer?
Randomize
