Funny, my mom didn't get it when I said 'that's what she said' after she said 'it's so thick, it's impossible' in reference to my milkshake
Your fb status are always so intriguing.. Often make me picture you naked
i'm 6 minutes and 3 drinks deep before she gets here. she's do-able for a wednesday night, but i still need to mentally prepare, ya know?
facebook friend requested him the morning after while he was still asleep in my bed, a whole new level of creeper even for me
I know he gets bloody noses a lot...so that explains all the blood...but I'd say the condoms are definitely from a penis.
I have bruises on the inside of my thighs from sliding down the stair case...thanks for encouraging that slut show
Life gets in the way of sexy Saturday sometimes
Found my wallet. It was under my dresser with a note that said "good job you found me". Drunk me is an ass.
Don't worry I'm alive. The apt is all locked up so I'm sleeping on the patio. The frozen pizza I got might be toast unless someone lets me in soon. If not its all good I'll be here snoring on the patio
But theres a keg here and me gusta
Of the past 48 hours, 46 of them have been spent naked. I'd say it's been a good two days.
He also ordered me a vibrator last week, so the flowers kind of balance it out
Just hooked up my fuck buddy with a job working for my dad...this can only end bad.
1 fuck you 2 fuck her 3 ur forgiven 4 im breaking up with her
Well, I like big penises but it's not like he walks around with it out or anything so yes I think he has beautiful eyes
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