woke up in Sigma Chi. In his room. they are iniating pledges right now. Holy fucking shit mother of pearl.
dude uncooked spaghetti noodles dipped in thousand island dressing is better than it sounds
This is worse that I thought. He's playing violin for me.
well the first picture of me in 2011 involves a viking helmet and chugging champagne. i like this year already.
I automatically know you're drunk now as soon as you start yelling in spanish
im breathing rainbows and everyone is talking in bubbles whatever you gave me give me more
Please never let me the drunk fat dancer in the bus girl
He had a joint rolled for us when he picked me up. It's how ASU does romance
Tell me when you get here. I'm drinking beer in the bushes next to your house, and I put my hoodie up because I was cold. Pretty sure everyone lowkey thinks i'm homeless.
i decided if i had to, i could survive with only 3 fingers on each hand.
I had sex for the second time today and ate an entire bag of alligator jerky on the way home. These truly are the golden years.
How do you say "thats kinda illegal" in thai?
we both turned hook ups into relationships we are crushing this thing called life right now.
Just so you know, I woke up with 2 oven mits in my bed and no clothes on.
I have drunkenly angered a family of raccoons. Please send help immediately.
Randomize
