Everything we own is covered in grass and KY
I love how its suddenly "not all about sex" now that he can't get it up
they got in a fight during sex...she came out yelling and covered in chocolate
They pulled him over whille he had a fish tank full of beer in his front seat. He told them it coudn't count as an open container cause the top was on it.
I just got while a charlie horse while orgasming...most confusing feeling ever...
Mom got me cough medicine that tastes like tequila . She said she took taste tests. Best mom ever.
Being high is an amazing excuse. I was using him for the potential of a beret, come on. I'd do that sober.
i spent an hour trying to convince my psychiatrist that the fact that i showed up for my appointment drunk was progress, and she does not agree
Maybe if more guys knew my pillowtalk occasionally includes me scribbling notebook diagrams of cell signalling pathways, I'd get laid more often
Sidenote: do you recall your "give me the d" chant
I think the paper my teacher just handed back to me had one of his pubes on it, I'm way too hungover for this
Its alot like that time you got motorboated by the carni at the rodeo.
I feel like I shouldn't be encouraging my friends to hook up with their teachers.....but if it's for academic reasons....then I definitely encourage it.
I smoked too much. I'm sitting on my balcony and I keep getting lost. Help me
When we were fucking he called me by his moms name then after we were done told me to call him. He's not receiving a call... What if his mom picks up?
Randomize
