moral of the story: I'm going to stab everyone
That girl's pussy is like White Castles, you crave it once in awhile, but you know next morning you regret eating it.
So it wasn't until I came that he pointed out the glow in the dark plastic star still stuck to my forehead. Fun times.
just scratched off #34 on my list of things to do before age 30 - drunk in a helicopter.
this morning your mother said to me "sorry to have to meet you like this, in my sons bed" later she said "you never know whos gonna be in there. its scary sometimes"
Every time she shows up on my newsfeed, I get the taste of tequila in my mouth.
Well, a cop just pulled up. This could go either way.
We had an indepth conversation about his employment at Arbys..
He slapped my ass... He best ask me out. Or figure out how to unslap my ass.
There is a reason my most meaningful relationship since 2012 has been with Duracel...
my god I love twenty year old dicks
I AM GONNA CUM EVERYWHERE TONIGHT BRO.
i just wanna know who wrote "dibbz" on my ass?
You had a 45min conversation with the Ronald McDonald statue I have the video to prove it
You talk the same way I hallucinate.
Randomize
