Send those Picts to my email please. From last night
Ps thx for the porn on my phone
;) ur welcome
what i wouldnt give for a night at orourkes without seeing 3+people ive slept with
Things to remember: Girls don't appreciate it when you yell "Beast Mode!" when switching to doggy style.
Wtf. Who made this Big Mac, Helen Keller?
We fucked standing up with my right leg over his shoulder. Thank you mom and dad for having once enrolled me in gymnastics. It has finally paid off
His whole family saw that I had cum in my hair once they turned on the blacklight at the bowling alley. You should have seen his mother's face.
Why yes actually, getting stoned and reading an AARP magazine IS totally where I wanted my night to end!
when i saw his roomate the next night he kept openly referring to me as "the girl who orgasms loud" when he would try to get my attention
NO TEQUILA
Why do I always think it's a good idea? Like a challenge? Shit maybe I should CHALLEGE myself to get laid for once instead
I tried to have a quickie with him at the company happy hour. I think I need to quit my job.
Can we talk about how she only slept with you because you remind her of a member of a K-pop group?
I just wiped cum off my face with baby wipes... #momlife
well, shes hot as hell, but she does keep saying she's the president of the loch ness monster's fan club, so that's kinda a red flag...
Ok so I need a recap of last night...
YOU SPENT SIX DOLLARS AT NICKEL BEER NIGHT!!! How's that
I got drunk. Then I took a shit.
It was a good shit
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