I figure if he loans me money i only owe him sex for the rest of the summer before i pay him back, right?
Ask him about the girl he took home Saturday night. I swear she voted for Kennedy.
I had to call maintenance to come unclog the toilet.
Something to remember me by.
he's speaking broken english and calling me isaac.. this is not the australian i ordered for a one nighter
yeah a little bit of me felt bad about it. But the rest of me was having sex with him.
it was all good until he screamed "for fraaannnceee" on his last thrust
Apparently, I kept going on about how i'm going to name my first born Ramen. I think this is a good parenting move.
All you have to do is speak. Your voice reverberates strait to my vagina.
we got her to the bathroom intime. all she could say was 'now my bladder is empty just like my soul'
I just ate cottage cheese and went to the gym at 6 this morning...the things i'll do because I might get naked in front of a new boy
I have work in an hour and I'm having trouble with concepts such as 'staying upright' and 'staying conscious'. Tie me to your wrist next time we go out drinking,
Do you think the police would frown on me opening a psych drug pharmacy on the side? Just to dispose of my drugs without polluting the water supply! It is for the animals!
No dude. I can't think of anything LESS sexy than yodeling
My brain is a dvd screensaver and I'm allowed to have a good thought when it hits the corner
Is she still on a quest to lick every stranger that enters the bar, or have the restraining orders reached critical mass?
Randomize
