So i decided to deal with the awkwardness of last night by making out with all three of them
"Not only do I bring a guy back to my hotel room....But I bring one back for my friend who's passed out drunk. Now that's what we call BESTfriends"
I used to practice getting hit by cars.
I've hooked up with 3 different guys already this week...don't tell me I haven't been a productive member of society
I should have taken pre-gaming this lunch date more seriously.
He's high as balls tripping balls and doing a reenactment of the scene where Buzz jumps off the balcony and can't fly to his soundtrack of Toy Story.
I'm done being subtle here. MOVE INTO MY EXTRA BEDROOM SO WE CAN FUCK WHENEVER AND NOT HAVE TO WORRY ABOUT FINDING PEOPLE TO HAVE CASUAL SEX WITH.
you live like 200 miles from me and I have two years of school left
goddamnit stop pointing out all the flaws in my plan
I used the hope and guess method to figure out who I slept with last night.
I totally straight up jacked your pants. I am so sorry.
I was full on naked standing in his room and I just said "this isn't me" and left.
I went to the strip club tonight. I had never gone, and in a panic I gave the dancer giving me a lap dance a handshake and introduced myself. Redefines business casual.
I stopped him mid keg stand to show him how cute my bra was...
Its guy fieris flavor town of suffering™
The only thing I remember about us having sex is yelling at him to choke me.
I'm sorry I walked in on you guys, but all I heard from outside was her screaming "Dive, dive!". Sex was my last guess for what was going on in there.
Randomize
