I need to shower the guilt off of my thighs.
Sex on a kitchen table is not as amazing as they make is seem in the movies.
well at that point we were just fucking to keep warm.
just used clorox wipes to give myself a whores bath. hello finals week
It's my diet secret . . . it's like slimfast but I call it cockfast instead.
We got the idea to smoke under his bed because, and I quote, "it'd be just like going camping"
We got a 5L jug of wine for 3 Euro. Italy was a good choice.
Just had a horrible realization. I've fucked a guy with a webbed foot AND a guy with a third nipple.
He sent me a picture of his dick earlier so now we can all laugh at him tomorrow
So I was thinking for Halloween I'd do Dr. Jekyll and Mr. Hyde....for my vagina.
You're more than welcome to join us! There's red velvet cake and apparently my pants are open for business I didn't consent to this
I figure even if it starts out as just sex I can bang him into loving me
Up until today, I never would have thought I'd have to tell someone not to color on the cat
It isn't easy. I met him at the gym. He wanted to go out he doesn't drive so I drove and he wanted Dairy Queen where his sister is the manager. This is dating in my 20's
She thinks you guys are the gods of the bathroom. If she runs past you naked, give me a heads up
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