Im glad youre not pregnant with that New Jersey assholes baby. Your vagina would have smelled worse than Newark.
my mom just informed me my dog smells like cum
I just called a child with a Yankees jersey a jerkoff. so much for a friendly day @ the ballpark
she said it was okay because they were "professional" nude pictures of her on the internet
Just wandered into a surprise final. Only a surprise for me though. I wish I could say this is the first time this has happened.
We made out for three hours. Then she said she didn't sleep with redheads and left the party. So yes, I'm still drinking.
Home. Hour long discussion with mom. Very frightened. Eating a sausage. Don't remember making it. Confused.
His IQ is so high, I swear I started ovulating when he told me the number.
As if right now I am a humanitarian. Full story to come in the morning. It involves sex.
At what point do you think my baptist preacher of a father will clue in that my brother "bringing a foreign exchange student" for thanksgiving means "bringing his european boyfriend and they'll probably fuck every night" for thanksgiving?
Sometimes I have to make sure these messages are going to you and I'm not about to give someone in my phone book a heart attack.
Has anyone ever blacked out at an art show your dad brought you to?
Is it weird to befriend your older alcoholic landlords?
I still judge her for aggressively trying to get coke from my date but pretty cool that she's a black belt
Nothing cures your heart after a boy calling you unattractive than a big fat dick
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