I am going to be in the room whjen you have your first child and spit on its face before its even all the way out of you.
He invited you over for Super Sexy Saturday and Cosmos... I'm pretty sure that's gay
I made him ride the giant pony statue in my friends little sisters room before i let him get in the bed.
The best part of my day was getting high in the parking lot of the movie theater and taking pics in the photo booth with the caption "CONGRATULATIONS!" we geeked out because it congratulated us for getting high
time for you to cut the loving, understanding, non-judgmental crap and say/do whatever it takes to make sure I never, ever, ever sleep with him again ever
She licked EVERYTHING then yelled at me in Spanish. I just kept saying SI.
I got frustrated so I just stood up and said take me to bed or lose me forever and banged the first guy who responded show me the way home. Thank you Top Gun.
Text me if something catches fire and I will put pants on
I never realized the effects a broken spine would have on my sex life
She's seen your dick through your pants. You don't need to ask
I still hate everything and everyone around me. Krampus taught me nothing.
where are my pants?
in the oven.
I don't care that he's really strong. I need him to make me cum not fix my back problems
It's official! Naked girl is back and making stir fry. Still not sure she realizes we can see her whole apartment from our balcony. Cheap beer and a show.
Trust me, I’ve got a sixth sense about dicks that tells me if a guy knows how to fuck and it’s tingling. You need to prove me right!
I’m not going to bang him just to confirm your Dickth Sense
The Dickth Sense!!! I love it! It’ll be our first porno!
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