we have to get out to the bar earlier. all of the guys are already committed to the girls they're going home with.
Check that he is NOT ok. He just heated up SoCo and used it as syrup on his pancakes.
OK, the bar's closing. Do I go to home to my wife or my girlfriend?
He's really hot. I think he's gonna be my reason to shave this winter.
Aj and I already plan to tape our thumbs to our palms so we know how it feels to be a t-rex.
You pulled me aside and handed me a plastic childrens' tea cup full of 151 and said "trust me its a great idea"
I just had a full choir singing the phrase pudding cup in my head. Too. Stoned.
I got picked up after "I just threw up in my face". Then I had very specific instructions involving the bathtub.
I told her to to let go of her rationtal thoughts and just enjoy the fact that i was going down on her till she passed out from sheer orgasmic pleasure.
Ive never seen a drunk man get suplexed before last week, now its the standard requirement every time we go out.
I got arrested in a leprechaun onesie
If I take a couple more shots I won't even know he's a Mormon that drives a motorcycle
I'm hungover and in a fort. And I hate you.
So many questions
I have bruises everywhere an I broke the lamp. So ya I'd considerate rough sex.
I’m a little confused...we were told by Cheeto Jesus and his minions multiple times that we would stop hearing about coronavirus the day after the election and, yet, I am still hearing about coronavirus. Is it possible they lied to us again?!?
Randomize
