mark looks like s**t tonight! thank da lawd we broke up!
it's mark...i'm guessing you didn't mean to send that to me...
You kept running into the wall most of the night. When people asked you what you were doing you told them you were the kool-aid man and there was little kids on the other side of the wall who needed your juice
I didn't think it was possible but there may actually be TOO MANY pictures of me tagged shotgunning.
Hey man sorry, can't talk. I'm already taking risks by ripping the bong on this conference call.
Me+graduation party+hammered drunk+polish horseshoes in the dark= black eye, crying, pissed, passed out in my dress... How was your weekend?
he tried breathing fire using moonshine and a roman candle. would not have believed it unless i actually witnessed it.
I should not be in class today. For the professors sake.
This will never work out with him unless I somehow learn how to unhinge my jaw like a python.
My goal for tonight is to swipe my debit card through those weird rolls on the back of a big bald guy's head.
Please brint me miilk. I am on the floor but my door is open. Thank you, i appreciate u verry much.
He is peeing inside and sticking up for himself. Those are two of the four signs of the apocalypse.
wanna come over? I have movies.
sure, what movies
porn or disney, your choice
Anddon't worry about me I have my Darth Vader flashlight
My friend had to carry her up the steps on his shoulder, and then she got up, found an ironing board and set it up in my friend's room just in case he needed to iron things.
just saw the most amazing side boob. i wanted to hold it.
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