A hot woman with candy. This is what heaven is filled with
I hate it when you make eye contact with someone bcs you are about to make fun of them and they take it as a hint to come hit on you.
he held my hand while i was giving him head. freud's gotta be turning over in his grave
Where does it all go? I've busted inside of you like 10 times in the last week.
Just woke up in a hotel next to a 38 year old mom who's married... I think Spring Break has started
after he gave me a diploma for giving him amazing head, getting a regular diploma isnt all that cool.
Let's turn this shoulder dislocation into a positive. Come to the hospital, bring some beers, let's party.
It never makes you rethink your life choices when you're breaking into my apartment at 3 am to take a piss in my kitchen sink?
I puked in my fridge last night while I was trying to get water
Dude. I'm super jealous I'm not there. Plus I look really pretty tonight, I'm wearing my long blue dress, I have long blonde hair, and I'm just sitting here hitting Larry the Long Bong. I'll pretend like your 3 spirits are floating in my smoke. Fuck.
I've got beer and a bag of saltwater taffy and croutons, is that enough for this typhoon thing?
Sex-sore abs and my workout pants have gravel stains on the knees. It's like the workout of shame.
Someone brought brownies to work and I was skeptical to eat one then I remembered I was at work and there is no way there is weed in them. Haha I'm blaming you for that.
She wants to have a threesome with Taylor Swift. I think this is the kind of love my grandparents spoke of.
the twins are trying to figure out which one is the one doing body shots off a janitor in this picture
Randomize
