It started with Hannah Montana and ended with alcoholism.
this is amzing! feels like my body is having sex with its surroundings!
he just watched a baby story on tlc while high and just called me screaming he never wants me to get pregnant
then he said we can't have sex anymore because ill hate him.
She has an album entitled "my photography", which consists of about 80 different pictures of a tractor that she took on her cell phone. I'm all for freedom of expression, but come on.
hey..i found a takeout box with a half-eaten hamburger in it, the box said to text this number if found...
I just miserably failed my own drug test. At least I know what a positive will look like when I give them to the employees tomorrow.
does it count as a threesome if she tried to blow the dude who was passed out next to us?
His arresting officer when they were busting up the squat party recognized him from the anti-drone protest. He was like Jesus kid, you were sober last time.
So a guy died and our dates revived him with CPR. Good night?
We could probably bang our way to enlightenment. However acid helps.
I trusted a fart in Toronto. NEVER TRUST A FART IN TORONTO.
Just used the word fistfucking in a serious conversation with my professor in front of the class, while making an appropriate and valid point. Win.
I could not add him. He gets 5 likes on Instagram.
Adulthood is putting your bongs in the dishwasher because you're too lazy to clean them manually.
Are you ok dude?
When you puked on me I said to you "we will just say that you threw some mostacholi at me"
Randomize
