day 8: i just gave goat a piece of pineapple soaked in rum. as an animal science major, im ashamed. as a normal person, it was awesome.
Not to make her into that kind of girl, but she did have a condom mural
He showed up drunk to my cousions HS grad party, we stayed at the bars till 2, then he got up at 5 to run a half marathon and by the time I woke up wlhe was already back and drinking.
She had one drink in her cleavage and another in her hand. She kept rotating between the two by leaning backward and then sipping the one in her hand.
5 am booty call.. And I went I need to gain better control of my vagina
And I feel bad.
Because we're having a serious discussion about our sex life and you're playing minecraft?
I got home and laid by the toilet and then alexa laid in the bathtub and sang the preamble while kayla held my hair
Oh you have a half-brother? Why that's right up my alley! Let's cause family strife
Tearing families apart since 2011.
While all the other girls were trying to out skut the next, Cameron was just doing cartwheels around the bar. I think she's the only one who got laid.
The cab driver was nice enough to let you finish your beer in the car, but you crossed the line when you started to pee in the empty bottle
I drew a nude short fat middle aged woman today and liked it
It was honestly one of my favorite days in art class except for the 20 min she faced me and kept looking at me and we made eye contact
WHY DOES HE HAVE TO CALL WHEN I'M MASTURBATING?! This time I'm really pissed. It's like he knows he's depriving me of orgasms.
i was so high i thought the horse on my poster was running
We just finished having sex and as soon as we get out of bed he yells "trust fall" and runs me over
If not, I can murder my liver twice...it's like a cat, it has 9 lives
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