he just texted me two pictures of his dick. i feel i should rethink whatever vibe im obviously giving out
so is it as big as he says?
he put a tube of toothpaste next to it as a reference. it looks legit
about to play the homeward bound drinking game. alone. what are you doing tonight?
I've got 15 minutes to eat dinner and drink a 40. Four years of college has all been training for this moment.
So I'm seriously not complaining - but I just fell ass backwards into a Tuesday night threesome. Sober
i want to go make food but i'll have to face my mom after telling her that the random i'm sleeping with, whose name i don't know, told me I was "too slutty to be his girlfriend" when i was drunk last night
I haven't been motivated enough for a shirt. And only half the day was bra-worthy.
Like we just had a bunch of sex and then he threaded my eyebrows in bed lol. It was amazing
I just found glitter from our Father's Day party on my balls this morning.
DAD WTF
She just left someone a voicemail saying 'you better not have plans Saturday night, cause I'm going to sit on your face.'
Got caught peeing in public. Sucks. It was a police station. Sucks worse.
Went home last night with that hot British guy. Sounded like I was f-ing in a Harry Potter movie.
Its safe now. But... Nobody should sleep on my bed tonight.
He's here walking around DRUNK AS FUCK in a Kobe Bryant number 8 jersey... Tucked in.
The Adderall says yes, but my body says no.
Omg I just smoked and it was the end so I basically got resin and death, my throat feels like the twilight vampire description of their thirst for blood
Randomize
