I woke up at 7am naked in my bathtub with the shower running. My apartment was so full of steam that my ceiling was dripping. Who thought it would be okay for me to get my own place, anyway?
Have you ever secretly resented a girl for wanting to have sex when all you really wanted to do was rub one out and go to sleep?
he said i ruined lesbian porn for him
I head back to the dorms in less than a week I'm not ready to see my roomate naked that much again.
Questioning the dried heart shaped nutella on my boobs. Valentines day has begun.
Dinner?
YES CON MARGARITAS POR FAVOR!!!! MUCHO MARGARITAS!!!
The fuck-me-pumps were hot, the XL hoody kinda ruined it.
WHAT IF I SAT OUTSIDE AND STARTED SCREAMING THE LYRICS TO O CANADA WOULD THAT FIX IT
PLEASE DON'T
I nicked my vulva while shaving and I'm about to go on a date where I will be having sex. Which bandaid: My Little Pony or princesses?
I don't wanna shit myself again in 2015
On my way to return shoes I bought so that I can afford to buy a pregnancy test. Is this adulthood?
2 weeks into this dating someone with money thing and I already don't know if I can go back to the being poor life
You kept yelling stranger danger at Nick because he was talking to that girl you didn't like. Your not invited ever again.
im about to go through the checkout with 3 flasks and a wedding card. let the judgement begin!
update: cashier guessed cash bar before i could say anything. completely bypassed "dry" and knew cash bar right away. i love this state.
What? I'll do just about anything if you give me a sticker.
Randomize
