Did you fuck her?
If by "fuck her" you mean "threw up on her shoes," then yes, I achieved that.
Why would you say my penis is small in front of so many people?
Some milfs here doing some blow
Dad?
It took my four years to get this degree, and 4 hours to lose it, My parents are not impressed.
It's official, my little sister has hooked up with more girls than I have.
just explained the breakup in detail to my big toes. that consolation brownie was Amazing.
Almost just got kicked out of a bar because the locals spilled beer everywhere when we taught them to shotgun.
How did "just two beers for happy hour" turn into naked backyard wrestling?
He's rapping about a turtle neck sweater. Please come get me.
Grandpa just put 6 jello shots on his plate. My aunt tried to take them away; he flipped her off. Living in the retirement home has hardened him.
I just remembered I did the whole byebyebye dance at the bar
It's cool bro. The video I have of you drunk trying to fix it with the sonic screwdriver was worth it.
I think he's only dating me for my ass...
you better come over.. I need a witness to help prove the couch talks to me
I may have made out with your roommate and your cousin tonight. In my defense I thought both of them were your cousin.
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