hey in girl talk does "want to come over tonight and have some beers with me?" mean i want wiener?
Its only 8 and she is already passed out
Perfect here is wht u do. Gently slip your index middle and ring finger into her butt hole but gently u dont wnt to wake her..let me know when ur ready for step 2
Once again you get dinner and all I get is semen on my leg
Guy at red light looking at porn. I'm waiting for him to look over at me so I can shake my head and he can feel bad
hey I'm just gonna fall asleep in the bathroom at the library call me when you're done with class
so i had a dream that andrew cuomo ate me out. guess who i'm voting for?
I really hope you are not drunk feeding a raccoon.
Today, my boyfriend informed me that I look like my dad when I orgasm
They are fixing my bike for free, trying to smoke me out, and their kids keep hugging me.
I need to stop getting in the car with my dad when im rolling balls. I think he's starting to notice my eyes aren't usually completely pupil
We're super invested in me shitting to my full potential
My girlfriend is talking to my ex-boyfriend at the bar right now. I REPEAT, GIRLFRIEND IS TALKING TO EX BOYFRIEND RIGHT NOW. GET ME THE FUCK OUT OF THIS PLAACE
Remember that guy I fucked last month? Well I'm watching his dog this weekend while he's in the Bahamas with his girlfriend. What is my life
he kissed both of us goodnight when we dropped him off...I didn't know if I was more offended or impressed
I got pulled over by the same cop in a 4.5 hour window. Got off both times. Fuck yes.
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