after he passed out we removed everything electronic from his room, stuck in some old books and an ancient typewriter from goodwill. for 20 min. we had him convinced he'd drunk himself backward in time.
my text book just quoted the cookie monster
My freaking DENTIST just commented on my hickies. Through the novacaine I managed to mumble 'It was my birthday' and she smiled knowingly.
Staying in I think. Boyfriend has domesticated me. I'm making eggs naked right now. Also really high.
No it's okay, we're just driving to random places with the portable stripper pole and causing a ruckus.
Oh that's normal
When you see a guy in a wheelchair try to be cool and pop a wheelie, and then fall over backward and hit his head, is it funny or sad?
The cougar has a calendar on her wall of when she can give topless handjobs again. I pity her husband.
I wish i could just live off of margaritas and good sex.
we were sitting in the kitchen and you kept biting my shoulder saying "itll all be over soon"
Are you up yet? I really want to know if i tried sleeping in a field... i have the vaguest memory of trying to
if there is one thing you splurge on it better be nice condoms
No, it's ok. He's Greek. To him I'm just a light drinker, not an alcoholic.
He fed me Girl Scout cookies while I was still tied up...what did I do right?
Sorry i ignored you for so long. I think my vibrator is broken.
Three cheers for handling my crush on my boss in an entirely reasonable manner, by having a threesome with my coworkers.
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