Dont worry, she is sitting right next to me. She is making it clear she wants to scissor
is it bad if my mug shot looks better than my profile picture?
Iiiiiii almost fall ib the lake
omg my older sister has been googling "how do I know if I've had an orgasm?" and "bj tips". the family laptop is not meant for this...
nothing like morning wood sex at 4pm. funemployment ftw
This guy in a neck brace is ordering bottle service at the strip club. Not sure whether to applaud his commitment or scorn his addiction. It's a draw.
if i can get a chik with a dibaetes pump naked a sling certainly isnt going to get in my way
I got stood up on a date. They are singing "dancing with myself" on karaoke in my honor.
Based off the amount of cat hair on my poncho....i stole a cat last night.
As soon as he came we went to Dairy Queen. That drive through lady was very condescending about our "just fucked" ice cream.
Can you think of a sexual word rhyming with snorkel?
Note to self: if you decide to go to the gym when you're coming down from your day high to shoot some hoops, do NOT play pickup basketball with the big black dudes who need a sixth
If they were bad they leave that night, if they were good they get a gold star, and if they were great they get invited back. Simple.
I literally just told you I found out I masturbate in my sleep. I think we can be snapchat friends again
Before making travel and hotel reservations to meet your "affair" for the first time, consult your menstrual calendar! $633 wasted!
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