We need to either start getting drunk more often or one of us need to start doin drugs
Wtf? Why?
I want awesome conversations to show the world.
I'm 99% sure that for 3 hours I thought you were British. We must smoke that again.
I don't care how ugly she is, I can't turn down a free movie +bj. In this economy that's downright irresponsible
failed my one goal of the day: wake up before 2 pm.
Just once id like to sleep with a man who i havent thrown up on
Hey on the reals though tomorrow if i take you out to lunch as just a friend will you also suck my cock as just a friend?
He left me a five minute voicemail apologizing for chasing me with a meat beater. I'm actually not sure what that means.
Just went outside to gather hail to use to make margaritas since we ran out of ice. That's God's way of helping us out.
This girl did not understand, once police sirens go on, road-head needs to STOP
Still want to know how you got back last night? Two Campus Security Officers carried you in around 430. Your pants were around your ankles.
I hate Sailor Jerry.
the saddest part is, this is not even the first time i've woken up in a shopping cart with a concussion.
I am stoned and listening to the Olympics music I downloaded on Saturday. Best 6 dollars I have ever spent.
Yes she was blowing me but I couldnt see her face. The only light was from the sparklers she asked me to hold. I love 4th of July.
Reasons why I'm always right: I am older, I am wiser, I have a larger penis
wasn't that the evening we made out with the girls from the dental school, drank 3000 beers, almost had to beat up a guy at the strip club and James nailed some hot piece of tail and took her OSU windbreaker, which my dad went on to wear multiple times after finding it in the garage.
Yes. To all of that. Yes.
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