"it" just moved
Do you remember last night at all? Be honest
I need to look at the pictures on my camera to fill in the gaps.
we made out on top of his cat.
Dude I'm telling you, conditioner is the best for jerking it in the shower. It feels great and afterwards everything is all smooth
She told me that she had to rub her face against me because she was part cat.
Ah, the precious few moments between when i wake up and when i realize why i'm sleeping on a treadmill.
do you ever get flashbacks of ppl you had sex with and just shudder at how gross they were/how drunk you were?
story of my life.
do you think semen can infect my impacted wisdom tooth
I didn't cheat on him. He just hasn't been informed of the open part of our relationship.
I think I'm still a little drunk from Sunday Funday and I just changed for a date in my car. wish me luck.
My mom legitimately hired a private eye on me. DO YOU KNOW HOW EXCITING MY LIFE JUST GOT???
I know how vodka works Grace. I'm drunk, not stupid.
sex on acid sucks though, i want to connect with the universe not your dick.
I sent him a tex saying, "I thought my intentions were clear" drunk me has some balls.
Hey, sorry I choked you last night... I was just really excited to see you.
Randomize
