can't come. weird drunk guy passed out on couch. long story, tell u later.
wtf. wake him up, call him a cab, get over here!
i just want to make sure he doesn't die. or rob me. plus it's facinating, he's faceplant on the arm of my sofa.
drinking colt 45 because lando calrissian told me to
oh fat girl friday strikes again...
Her "get-your-paper-done-early-blowjob" incentive is the thing that has successfully deterred my procrastination
you only had a canadian ten, but you said it was all good cuz you would just by molson.
Remind me to never go to the bar with your Asian friends again. I need to be able to read or pronounce what I'm drinking.
Weird question, would you want to do fetish porn? you get paid.
How many times can I tell him that I wasn't expecting sex before he finally figures out that I'm just too lazy to shave?
Can't. I took a Viagra to make sure I wouldnt leave the room so I might actually study.
We're all just looking at each other quietly, hoping that no one brings up last nights shenanigans.
Just blowing bubbles with my nipple rings in my shower.
You always make things weird.
At this point, just throw that mattresses away. Or bronze it and display it as a testament to your shame. either is good.
is that a sigh of girlish delight, or "sigh...I'm having a herpes outbreak'
Can't it be both?
id like to think im the only pot dealing prostitute that is also an ordained minister. but maybe not. what a time to be alive
My vagina needs a break, I had to ice it with a beer bottle last night.
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