It says i should accept HIV aids as my friend on facebook.We have 12 friends in common. I need new friends.
duuuude. vodka popsicles DO NOT function.
I don't believe these are real court rooms. They look absolutely nothing like law and order.
I came home to burning cookies and him outside "tanning" naked.
He just wants an even tan
He came into the hospital yelling "HEY EVERYBODY! REMEMBER ME?"
There are at least 3.6 billion human cocks in this world. Get some. Get as many as humanly possible. Literally. Do it. 1-2-3 go!
Also, am I the only one who noticed he didn't fuck you until after you were technically a cripple? Or am I reading into this too much? Congrats on that btw
Throwing up out both ends. This is not how I pictured adulthood.
She was giving me head while we were in my tree house, my mom then came out to let the dog out so she stopped so I would stop groaning, was it good? You tell me
So the woman who sold us weed at the park is pregnant. With another small child. And the basket she used to carry the joints is decorated with Barney stickers.
She's like a yuppie Nancy Botwin. She just gets better and better.
Because I know nothing is hotter than ocean themed dick pics on SnapChat...
I'm getting "congrats on your engagement" shots. I need to get engaged more often!
A boy in some branch of the military kissed me I think I'm going through an American sniper phase
it's a rainbow of FUCK YOU
I guess daylight savings isn't a holiday we need to celebrate for three days...
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