I am like the Mr. Miyagi of queefs.
I just realized that if I marry him I will have the same last name as spiderman. this makes my decision so much harder.
Going to get tested monday. You're coming with. Bonding time, slut style.
you kept making us tell you how cute you looked in your new outfit, even after you threw up all over it
so what if he's got a new girlfriend. the guy i'm fucking has an english accent. i win.
It took my four years to get this degree, and 4 hours to lose it, My parents are not impressed.
I only have two playlists on my iPod. One for when im getting drunk, one for when I'm getting high. Is this something to be worried about?
We just taught the Brazilian how to smoke out of a vuvuzela.
He straight up just had me drive all the way here and when I got here he was drinking a cup of tea and right after said he needed to go to bed
I plan on showing these boobs to so many people that by the end of it ill just have a shirt of beads.
Just found my socks folded and in the back pocket of my jeans. Apparently drunk me refuses to lose shit after the panties incident over New Years.
I feel like I don't show you my boobs enough. And you deserve to see them like all the time
When you trip so hard that you can see your friends thoughts through their pupils.
If u could sum last night up in one word?
omgwtfpineapple
Is there a number of dicks a girl can have in a weekend before it becomes unacceptable? Asking for a friend
Remember! It’sa long weekend and a holiday weekend and it’s America’s birthday! So don’t short change me!
I thought you were asking for a friend
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