I just got back to Nicks and I shoul dnot have drank this much when I have to work at 7AM!!!!!
It's like I'm the Little Bo Peep of sheparding dicks.
Only someone with your twisted mind could come up with that simile. Do you sit around and read 'How to turn Beloved Childrens Stories into Sexual Analogies?' This is the 3rd time you've done this.
Oh and discovery of the day is it's the channel, not the time on your cable box. Thought it was 2:16 for 4 hours
bio was interesting today. swabbed my mouth to see what the cells where, ha. found a sperm cell. he was just that awesome
Did we fight the bathroom girl ? She just wanted to give us lotion and condoms.
My three rules on what I'm wearing tonight. Something short, something see through, and something i had sex in.
I don't know what I wash first. My body or my puke painted car. People are judging me as I drive by.
Yours weakened by children. Mine weakened by a forearm sized cock for 8 years.
I know. It's cray. Crayon. Crayolaaaaa.
I said to him "i can't have sex with anyone in my friend's living room" then he said "we can move the air mattress into the kitchen"
HOW DO I ALWAS FIND THEM?! THERE WAS BE A SOCIETY OF SMALL PENISED MEN AND I MUST BELONG TO IT!
Do you have any idea how hard it is to iphone keyboard type "roflcopter" when intoxicated?
I want a bottle of whiskey to be dropped at my doorstep like a stork drops babies when they are delivered to their parents.
God what have you done to be that much in need of alcohol.
Me WANTS my preciousssssssssss
She wanted me to stick my dick in the birthday cake she got me
I just realized I had arrested my one night stand from last night...
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