quick I need to know all the foods that the very hungry caterpillar ate
I've come to notice a late period isn't as exciting when you have no reason to worry
You saying I have a drinkingg problem is like saying Superman has a flying problem.
Dude, can't find my socks anywhere....
Yeah, you took a shit in the harbor off a wall, used them to wipe. I'm sure they're still on the beach somewhere if you really want them back
It feels like Jesus smacked me in the face with the new testament for drinking so much last night
she crawled under her car and passed out. Unfortunately her feet were sticking out and someone called 911 because they thought she had been run over.
Whales. Broccoli little trees giant. Magic in cat form. I want my loco and juice. Black in shower. Brb remember life.
I threw up sweet potatoes. Worst thing to throw up ever. They came back mashed.
Would it be bad if I bought her bread, meat, cheese, and stuff as her christmas present so she can make me a sandwich?
Honestly I will go to church for him, I will even try to quit smoking for him. But his dick is not worth losing alcohol. He sure as fuck isn't taking away our wine nights.
I just ate 6 cheeseburgers with some homeless guy. Pretty epic.
spring break - time to see if my two week detoxing gave my liver a chance to recover.
I can't. Currently naked covered in Nair trying desperately to catch his cat that rubbed up on my leg.
I hate that cat.
Best case scenario you died and I melt into poo
On another note I am sitting in my bed naked, buzzed, and working on a notecard for my 8:00am test tomorrow. I think I need to make better choices.
Randomize
