how about we just leave your boyfriend out of this
im in a kiddie pool, high, with a keg in arms reach. If i had a sandwich and a blowjob this would be the best day ever
the last girl i hooked up with and the last guy i hooked up with are hooking up right now. this is where bisexuality becomes a problem.
When the cops came you just told them you'd go to your time out corner.
It was everywhere, it looked like he just took the leftovers and threw them around the bathroom... Festively...
Leaving ole miss girls house to go to the stripper girls house. Why did it take losing my job to start getting laid all the damn time?
You coming bye my yot got egg sweet carilne vodklaa
We invented "Diesel Bombs." They're supposed to be a bomb, but they come in a 20+ oz. glass and have a blackout record of 6 wins and 0 losses. Undoubtedly going to be the next Muhammed Ali of the drinking world.
Ended up at a lesbian bar and almost got stabbed in the eye with a dart. Weirdest bachelor party ever.
I pulled some girls weeve trying to pull the stop cord on the bus
All together there was 318 cigarette butts in the pool... And my microwave.
Germany has fetish clubs for everything. We are going to Germany. Germany is our friend.
Yeah..I guess you know your hair looks like shit when TSA asks to inspect it
Sorry about my life...
i think she learned that just cuz half shots were easier, doesnt mean she can have triple as many.
Randomize
