Not a fireman, but good enough for last night.
whoever gets the blood i just donated is getting a shit ton of free thc
i hope thats the last time i ever see ryan's hairy ass fucking
so I made out with a lobbyist last night. im officially a resident of D.C
Look what our sorority has done to us...we're hitting on girls in hopes of getting an awesome little.
He told the cop he was underage, handed the cop his ID, and the police report read "I then informed the suspect that he was not, in fact, underage"
As i looked at his penis, it stared back into my soul. No more drinking games.
I think my whole family judged my ability to change under a blanket.
In a moving vehicle and other people in the car
Not sure I just ate a really big pot brownie, I feel like my future is uncertain
I love shooting for the middle. Those girls never wake up well.
You went to the animal party as a hoodrat. You won the most creative costume contest.
And I'm bringing my coffee cup of wine.
And at the semi-adult age of 25 I have shit my pants. Not even drunk, just really late to work. Is this real life?
He burst in the bathroom while I was peeing to hand me my beer I was looking for earlier tht night. And my pants were already down so I thought why not
The cops asked Ben if he was drunk and he slurred "I'm man enough to admit that I am" with a southern draw
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