Went to gas station for smokes. three cops pulled in. got gas i didn't need. found diff gas station.
good choice.
ok 1 i realized people actually live in central wisconsin and 2 culvers could be a good place to pick up chicks today
Im too awkward for one night stands. I need to hire someone to come clear them out of my bed before I wake up.
Would you still love me if I had no teeth
Yeah why?
Cuz i woke up this morning and a few are gone
You were in the bathroom for two hours practicing "Revenge Faces".
random question: do you know anywhere in the tri-state that has elephant racing? this is a work related question.
I'm eating dry tortillas on a mattress without a sheet. and i thought my life would change after graduation.
She told me she's going to buy a projector so she can watch porn on her ceiling...I'm telling you man this chick is going places
WHAT THE FUCK. SUCH A BAD IDEA. YOU'RE NO LONGER IN CHARGE OF NOSE SUBSTANCES.
I may or may not have traded your body to the rodeo's owner for free beer.
Let's try finding a bar where there aren't people who want to hang me from a tree by my nutsack
If there aren't any tits where you are, you're doing it wrong.
You start to question your party girl tendencies when you're wearing the same shirt you wore the night before to work and you're trying to get last nights Jell-O shot off the sleeve on your way to work
I'm no longer puke free since 2013 am I.
I threw a lamp at you?
Yes, yes you did.
Awesome
Randomize
