i just won a 100 dollar gift card to walmart in a karaoke contest...i love kentucky
I got "discovered a new religion high" last night
We tried to play doctor all sexually then he was taking down my 'symptoms' I said I needed to puke he thought it was part of the game
guess who has a date tonight
look at you growing up, going on dates before she hops into bed
Ate apple sauce off his penis. Nutritious and slutty.
Think I pulled my pelvic muscle.
I think I pulled my ashamed of myself muscle.
Is adulthood just morning sex and then walking through the grocery store 20 min later looking for something to take to work for lunch?
...and then running into your dad at said grocery store...
Somehow it went from suicide to pierced nipples. I think we're good.
I was wearing my get used bookstore shirt when we fucked. Ironic yet appropriate.
You know you are 86'd from the legacy right? You can't down shots then spike the shot glass
Never let him bartend when he's tripping. He sprinkled a ton of mexican shredded cheese over a jack and coke and called in a Monterey Jack Daniels.
Well get back to your date and give him the ceremonial 1am handy and text me when your done.
In other news, I had my first sex related injury of the school year so that's cool
Haha. I have resting bitch face. He has I want y'all to die face. It's a subtle difference
BUT YOU GOTTA TASTE THE RAINBOW!!
That's what Skittles are for!
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