I have nothing to say, just wanted ur phone to vibrate
i got kicked out of Barns and Nobles cuz i put all the bibles in the fiction section
The dutch village is so much worse hungover. Fuck them and their wooden shoes.
I'm a terrible person. There are two guys speaking sign language on the metro platform and at first I thought they were drunk and doing a silly dance.
Hungover like ... in bed with the Brita pitcher and a straw, only opening one eye at a time.
Just filled the brita up in the bathtub because we couldn't get it into the sink.
But hes like a baby bird with a broken wing that i want to FUCK.
Make sure you have everything youll need until sunday. aka a green shirt and condoms.
Faces of meth called, they want their look back.
it's just not right when you're boyfriend has a nicer ass than you do.
If a cougar buys you pizza and wants to show you her newly-won house, you have sex with her. It's the law. Just being all the man I can be dude
Did I leave the house with out a shirt or socks?
Yea, you said you didn't need them cause she was going to take them off anyways and that it would "save time".
i got to his house for our first date at the same time as his dealer, so what I'm saying is I'm in love
Tequila is never to blame. We all make good choices under tequila
I hummed the theme from jaws while she was taking the pregnancy test....needless to say she was not pleased
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